Wellness for Peace: MAKE PEACE WITH YOUR PARTNER & AVOID INFIDELITY

An affair is an extreme symptom of a relationship that has been in trouble for some time. Affairs do not happen out of the blue and rarely happen because someone is a bad person. Cheating is caused by one single factor: "Lack." In a relationship, it's a lack of love, attention, intimacy, recognition, respect, and connection that builds up over time. Eventually, this "lack" can become so painful that the person in the most pain will often act out by cheating. Because communication has broken down, the cheating person doesn't feel like they can talk to their partner, so that makes them vulnerable to cheating. So, how do you avoid getting to this point in a relationship? Below are seven ways to avoid the "lack" and prevent a potential affair."
Wellness for Peace: Emotional Management: HOW TO HELP YOUR PARTNER AVOID INFIDELITY: "
1. Avoid complacency. Don't ever take your relationship for granted. Partnerships need to be nourished daily by a kind word, appreciation, a loving kiss, a smile. Complacency is a warning signal that you and your partner are out of touch with each other.
2. Keep the lines of communication open. Don't sweep issues under the rug. They won't go away! Learn ways to resolve differences so that recurring arguments don't continue.
3. Pay attention to your gut. If you're feeling something isn't quite right in your relationship, 99 percent of the time you're correct. Find a way to approach your partner to talk about things. Keep your relationship current by checking in on a weekly basis to make sure problems aren't building up.
4. Find time for each other. Don't get so busy that you forget to have a date with your partner. Make time away from chores and work to renew your loving feelings. Remember how important your mate is to you. Tell them, by making time for them.
5. Know when it's a time of stress and pay attention to your partner even more. Some common trigger times for extra stress in a relationship are job changes, health problems, changes in finances, and the death of a family member or friend. During these stressful periods, pay extra attention to your relationship. Let your partner know you're there, and make even more time to connect with each other.
6. Understand the real issues in your relationship. Learn tools for resolving arguments. Avoid blaming, shaming, and the need to always be right in an argument. Learn what you're really fighting about so that you can resolve your issues. If you're fighting about the wrong thing, you'll never resolve arguments.
7. Always remember what it was that made you fall in love with your partner. Too often we allow our disagreements to cloud our love for our significant other, and we forgot why we even fell in love! Keep your sense of humor. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt and don't make them your enemy.
Avoid the "lack" and affair-proof your relationship by staying conscious of yourself and your partner. Nurture each other and keep the lines of communication open.
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Wellness for Peace: How to Protect Your Heart at Every Age? Tips if You are in Your 60s

Get Even More Vigilant About Screenings. After you go through menopause and get older, your blood pressure and cholesterol tend to go up, and blood vessels get stiffer. "Have your blood sugar, blood pressure and cholesterol measured yearly," advises Dr. Goldberg.

Consider Medication. If you have hypertension or high cholesterol, the way you've been managing it before may not be enough. "As you get older, you may need more aggressive therapy," Dr. Bonow says. "High blood pressure that was controlled with one medication may now require three to control it." Talk to your doctor about whether you need to add to or adjust your medications to control your risk factors.
Wellness for Peace: Protect Your Heart at Every Age: "Be Alert to Symptoms. Now is when the first noticeable symptoms of heart disease may appear, so it's important to know what's normal for your body and be on the lookout for worrisome signs like chest discomfort, shortness of breath or changes in exercise tolerance—meaning you suddenly feel winded going up a flight of stairs or feel unusually tired for no apparent reason, says Dr. Mieres. If these appear, see your doctor pronto!

Source: http://health.yahoo.com/featured/82/protect-your-heart-at-every-age/
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Wellness for Peace: How to Protect Your Heart at Every Age? Tips if You are in Your 50s

Move More. Around menopause, you tend to gain extra weight around your belly, which can lead to insulin resistance, inflammation and heart strain. Cardiovascular fitness also starts to decline, particularly if you're not that physically active to begin with. "Unfortunately, at this point, women have to burn more calories to stay at the same weight," Dr. Stevens says. Start taking the stairs instead of the elevator whenever you can, walk faster around the mall, or jog to the mailbox to send letters instead of sticking your hand out the car window as you drive by. Small changes really do add up.

Have an ECG. Silent heart abnormalities become more common in your 50s, and an electrocardiogram (ECG) to check your heart's electrical activity can pick them up, says Dr. Goldberg. Also ask your doctor if you should have a stress test; this is especially important if you're just starting to exercise."
Wellness for Peace: Protect Your Heart at Every Age: "Add Fiber. Besides being good for your cholesterol and blood sugar, pumping up your fiber intake (think whole grains like oatmeal, brown rice and flaxseeds, as well as beans, fruits and veggies) can help prevent constipation, which becomes more of a problem as you get older and your digestive system starts to slow down.
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Wellness for Peace: How to Protect Your Heart at Every Age? Tips if You are in Your 40s

Make Sleep a Priority. Thanks to peri-menopause, fluctuating hormone levels can interfere with a good night's sleep. But not getting at least seven hours of shut-eye regularly can lead to increased blood pressure, low-grade inflammation and higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol, all of which are harmful for your blood vessels and heart, explains Jennifer H. Mieres, MD, a cardiologist at New York University School of Medicine and coauthor of Heart Smart for Black Women and Latinas. Lack of sleep has also been linked to weight gain. So establish good habits: Turn in (and wake up) at the same time every day—even on weekends—and do your best to relax before going to bed, whether it's watching a favorite funny TV show or reading.
"Wellness for Peace: Protect Your Heart at Every Age: "Reassess Your Risk Factors. You may discover that your cholesterol, blood pressure and blood sugar levels have changed in this decade, even if you aren't doing anything differently, says Dr. Hayes. In fact, 22 percent of 40-something women have high blood pressure and 50 percent have high cholesterol (a jump from 38 percent of women in their 30s), according to the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute. Also, be sure to get your thyroid checked around 45; hypothyroidism (an underactive thyroid gland), which becomes more common as women get older, can negatively affect your cholesterol levels as well as your heart.

Step Up Strength Training. You start to lose muscle mass more rapidly in your 40s, which causes your metabolism to slow down since muscle burns more calories than fat. Unfortunately, this makes it harder to stave off those extra pounds. To help maintain muscle and keep your metabolism going, aim for two 15-minute sessions weekly of lifting weights, using a resistance band or doing other toning exercises.

Carve out Personal Time. "Between the demands of work and family, it becomes even more challenging to find time for yourself in your 40s," says Dr. Mieres. But it's crucial to do so—not only to help ease stress but also to guard against depression, which commonly crops up in this decade and can raise your risk of heart disease. "Find at least 10 minutes of ‘me' time every day to do something—even if it's just chatting on the phone with a friend—that helps you destress and regroup," says Dr. Mieres.

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Wellness for Peace: How to Protect Your Heart at Every Age? Tips if You are in Your 30s

Get a Grip on Stress. When you're juggling career and family, it's crucial to find stress management techniques that work. "Untamed stress has a direct negative impact on heart health," says Dr. Stevens. "The constant bombardment of adrenaline raises blood pressure and destabilizes plaque in your arteries, making it likely to cause a clot or heart attack."

Lose the Baby Weight. No, you don't have to fit into your skinny jeans by the time the baby's 6 months old, but do aim to get back to your pre-pregnancy weight within one to two years. "Carrying around extra pounds can lead to high cholesterol, high blood pressure and other heart disease risk factors," Dr. Bonow says. Also remember that it's easier to lose weight in your 30s than in your 40s, when your metabolism slows down.
"Wellness for Peace: Protect Your Heart at Every Age: "Stay Social. It's important to stay connected to friends and family for the sake of your mood and heart. Research at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine found that high levels of loneliness increase a woman's risk of heart disease by 76 percent. On the flip side, having strong social support can help lower your blood pressure and improve other cardiovascular functions. Set aside time once or twice a week to call friends, or make a monthly dinner date.

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Wellness for Peace: How to Protect Your Heart at Every Age? Tips if You are in Your 20s

Stub Out a Social Smoking Habit. Smoking is enemy number one when it comes to heart disease, and even just a few cigarettes can do damage: New research from McGill University in Montreal found that smoking just one cigarette a day stiffens your arteries by a whopping 25 percent. Plus, smoking erases the hormonal advantage you have from estrogen, which can leave you vulnerable to a heart attack before menopause, explains Dr. Bonow.

Don't Ignore the Birth Control Factor. Remember that hormonal contraceptives slightly increase the risk of blood clots, so if you've ever had one, make sure to discuss it with your doctor before going on birth control. And if you're currently a smoker, don't take oral contraceptives, because the combo can be especially dangerous, says Sharonne N. Hayes, MD, director of the Women's Heart Clinic at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota.
Wellness for Peace: Protect Your Heart at Every Age: Watch Your Alcohol Intake. Moderate amounts of alcohol can have a beneficial effect on your heart. (By "moderate," we mean one drink a day or about 5 ounces—but many restaurants serve far more than that.) Overdoing it can raise triglycerides, increase blood pressure and lead to weight gain, thanks to all those empty calories.
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Wellness for Peace: PEACE OF MIND. Ways to Achieve it One Piece @ a Time

Wellness for Peace: PEACE OF MIND. Ways to Achieve it One Piece @ a Time: "Don't take everything too personally. Some emotional and mental detachment is desirable. Try to view your life and other people with a little detachment and less involvement. Detachment is not indifference, lack of interest or coldness. It is the ability to think and judge impartially and logically. Don't worry if again and again you fail to manifest detachment. Just keep trying. .... Let bygones be gone. Forget the past and concentrate on the present moment. There is no need to evoke unpleasant memories and immerse yourself in them......Practice some concentration exercises. This will help you to reject unpleasant thoughts and worries that steal away your peace of mind.

Learn to practice meditation. Even a few minutes a day will make a change in your life......Inner peace ultimately leads to external peace. By creating peace in our inner world, we bring it into the external world, affecting other people too.
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'via Blog this' Other Tips for Inner Peace:

Reduce the amount of time you read the newspapers or watch the news on TV.

Stay away from negative conversations and from negative people.

Don't hold grudges. Learn to forget and forgive. Nurturing ill feelings and grievances hurts you and causes lack of sleep.

Don't be jealous of others. Being jealous means that you have low self-esteem and consider yourself inferior to others. This again, causes lack of inner peace.

Accept what cannot be changed. This saves a lot of time, energy and worries.

Every day we face numerous inconveniences, irritations and situations that are beyond our control. If we can change them, that's fine, but this is not always possible. We must learn to put up with such things and accept them cheerfully.

Learn to be more patient and tolerant with people and events.

Wellness for Peace: HUMAN BEHAVIORS: Understanding Autism

Autism is a lifelong developmental disability. It is part of the autism spectrum and is sometimes referred to as an autism spectrum disorder, or an ASD. The word 'spectrum' is used because, while all people with autism share three main areas of difficulty, their condition will affect them in very different ways. Some are able to live relatively 'everyday' lives; others will require a lifetime of specialist support.

The three main areas of difficulty which all people with autism share are sometimes known as the 'triad of impairments'. They are:

difficulty with social communication
difficulty with social interaction
difficulty with social imagination.
These are described in more detail below:

Difficulty with social communication

"For people with autistic spectrum disorders, 'body language' can appear just as foreign as if people were speaking ancient Greek."

People with autism have difficulties with both verbal and non-verbal language. Many have a very literal understanding of language, and think people always mean exactly what they say. They can find it difficult to use or understand:

facial expressions or tone of voice
jokes and sarcasm
common phrases and sayings; an example might be the phrase 'It's cool', which people often say when they think that something is good, but strictly speaking, means that it's a bit cold.
Some people with autism may not speak, or have fairly limited speech. They will usually understand what other people say to them, but prefer to use alternative means of communication themselves, such as sign language or visual symbols.

Others will have good language skills, but they may still find it hard to understand the give-and-take nature of conversations, perhaps repeating what the other person has just said (this is known as echolalia) or talking at length about their own interests.

It helps if other people speak in a clear, consistent way and give people with autism time to process what has been said to them.

Difficulty with social interaction

"Socialising doesn't come naturally - we have to learn it."

People with autism often have difficulty recognising or understanding other people's emotions and feelings, and expressing their own, which can make it more difficult for them to fit in socially. They may:

not understand the unwritten social rules which most of us pick up without thinking: they may stand too close to another person for example, or start an inappropriate subject of conversation
appear to be insensitive because they have not recognised how someone else is feeling
prefer to spend time alone rather than seeking out the company of other people
not seek comfort from other people
appear to behave 'strangely' or inappropriately, as it is not always easy for them to express feelings, emotions or needs.
Difficulties with social interaction can mean that people with autism find it hard to form friendships: some may want to interact with other people and make friends, but may be unsure how to go about this.

Difficulty with social imagination

"We have trouble working out what other people know. We have more difficulty guessing what other people are thinking."

Social imagination allows us to understand and predict other people's behaviour, make sense of abstract ideas, and to imagine situations outside our immediate daily routine. Difficulties with social imagination mean that people with autism find it hard to:

understand and interpret other people's thoughts, feelings and actions
predict what will happen next, or what could happen next
understand the concept of danger, for example that running on to a busy road poses a threat to them
engage in imaginative play and activities: children with autism may enjoy some imaginative play but prefer to act out the same scenes each time
prepare for change and plan for the future
cope in new or unfamiliar situations.
Difficulties with social imagination should not be confused with a lack of imagination. Many people with autism are very creative and may be, for example, accomplished artists, musicians or writers.

Other related characteristics

Love of routines

"One young person with autism attended a day service. He would be dropped off by taxi, walk up to the door of the day service, knock on it and be let in. One day, the door opened before he could knock and a person came out. Rather than go in through the open door, he returned to the taxi and began the routine again."

The world can seem a very unpredictable and confusing place to people with autism, who often prefer to have a fixed daily routine so that they know what is going to happen every day. This routine can extend to always wanting to travel the same way to and from school or work, or eat exactly the same food for breakfast.

Rules can also be important: it may be difficult for a person with autism to take a different approach to something once they have been taught the 'right' way to do it. People with autism may not be comfortable with the idea of change, but can cope well if they are prepared for it in advance.

Sensory sensitivity

"Rowan loves art but he hates wearing a shirt to protect his clothing - the feeling of the fabric against his skin causes him distress. We have agreed with his school that he can wear a loose-fitting apron instead."

People with autism may experience some form of sensory sensitivity. This can occur in one or more of the five senses - sight, sound, smell, touch and taste. A person's senses are either intensified (hypersensitive) or under-sensitive (hypo-sensitive).

For example, a person with autism may find certain background sounds, which other people ignore or block out, unbearably loud or distracting. This can cause anxiety or even physical pain.

People who are hypo-sensitive may not feel pain or extremes of temperature. Some may rock, spin or flap their hands to stimulate sensation, to help with balance and posture or to deal with stress.

People with sensory sensitivity may also find it harder to use their body awareness system. This system tells us where our bodies are, so for those with reduced body awareness, it can be harder to navigate rooms avoiding obstructions, stand at an appropriate distance from other people and carry out 'fine motor' tasks such as tying shoelaces.

Special interests

"My art activity has enabled me to become a part of society. When there is something that a person with autism does well, it should be encouraged and cultivated."

Many people with autism have intense special interests, often from a fairly young age. These can change over time or be lifelong, and can be anything from art or music, to trains or computers. Some people with autism may eventually be able to work or study in related areas. For others, it will remain a hobby.

A special interest may sometimes be unusual. One person with autism loved collecting rubbish, for example; with encouragement, this was channelled into an interest in recycling and the environment.

Learning disabilities

"I have a helper who sits with me and if I'm stuck on a word she helps me. It makes a big difference."

People with autism may have learning disabilities, which can affect all aspects of someone's life, from studying in school, to learning how to wash themselves or make a meal. As with autism, people can have different 'degrees' of learning disability, so some will be able to live fairly independently - although they may need a degree of support to achieve this - while others may require lifelong, specialist support. However, all people with autism can, and do, learn and develop with the right sort of support.

Other conditions are sometimes associated with autism. These may include attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), or learning difficulties such as dyslexia and dyspraxia.

Who is affected by autism?

Autism is much more common than most people think. There are over half a million people in the UK with autism - that's around 1 in 100 people.

People from all nationalities and cultural, religious and social backgrounds can have autism, although it appears to affect more men than women. It is a lifelong condition: children with autism grow up to become adults with autism.

What causes autism?

The exact cause of autism is still being investigated. However, research suggests that a combination of factors - genetic and environmental - may account for changes in brain development.

Autism is not caused by a person's upbringing, their social circumstances and is not the fault of the individual with the condition.

Is there a cure?

At present, there is no 'cure' for autism. However, there is a range of interventions - methods of enabling learning and development - which people may find to be helpful. Many of these are detailed on our website: www.autism.org.uk/approaches

What is a diagnosis?

A diagnosis is the formal identification of autism, usually by a health professional such as a paediatrician or a psychiatrist. Having a diagnosis is helpful for two reasons:

it helps people with autism (and their families) to understand why they may experience certain difficulties and what they can do about them
it allows people to access services and support.
People's GPs can refer them to a specialist who is able to make a diagnosis. Many people are diagnosed as children; their parents and carers can ask GPs for a referral.

Some professionals may refer to autism by a different name, such as autism or autistic spectrum disorder (ASD), classic autism or Kanner autism, pervasive developmental disorder (PDD) or high-functioning autism (HFA).


Where do I go next?
Our Autism Helpline offers confidential information and advice on autism and related issues.

Tel: 0845 070 4004
(open 10am-4pm, Monday-Friday)
Email: autismhelpline@nas.org.ukWellness for Peace: HUMAN BEHAVIORS: Understanding Autism: "
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